When You Feel Alone in a Crowd

On Friday night, my mother-in-law kindly picked me up and took me to the airport, where I flew out on a great weekend adventure to visit my writer friend, Lisa Jacobson, for her ___th birthday. (Not sure she would appreciate me inserting the number there.)

But I have to tell you that ever since my dad went to be with the Lord last year, well, I’ve had a really hard time being away from my husband. I’ve been unusually clingy to him and have had anxiety to be separated from someone who has been such a friend and comfort to me.

So I was doing OK until I hit Salt Lake — because when you live in northwest Montana you have to fly to Salt Lake in order to head to Central Oregon. (It makes no sense.)

But in Salt Lake I stepped out of the airplane and into the terminal, where I had a two-and-a-half-hour layover. I felt like a lost child.

Standing in the middle of this huge waiting area, I fought a rising panic and the urge to burst into tears. I wanted to yell, Matthew! and have him come running. Except he wasn’t there.

And then Jesus said, “Hello.”

Behold, I am with you always (Matthew 28:20, ESV).

Behold: Look, sister.

Reminds me of Matt when I get really upset. “Look at me,” he says. “Look at me,” he says again, because I hardly ever obey well the first time when I’m distraught about something. And he waits until I’m looking him in the eye and am ready to receive the encouragement he has to give me.

So on Friday I had to look for what I could not see, for the close company of my Lord in the middle of the airport. Someone who gets me. Someone who remembers my dad is gone and how sad I still feel and who is very “husbandy” when my husband isn’t around to hold me and make it all better.

Look at me.

So if you are feeling completely alone today, you are not. Take a deep breath and look, because being alone is a lie that the devil whispers in our ears. He is telling us something that isn’t true, so we have to practice overcoming the lie and believing the promise.