Sun. Nov 24th, 2024

5 Reasons We Don’t Develop Meaningful Friendships

Good friends

Last month two close friends of mine, Matt and James, drove several hours from South Carolina and Alabama to pray with me about some important decisions I’m facing. They didn’t ask me for money for gas or meals. They didn’t charge me a consulting fee. They just wanted to do what friends do—they sacrificed their own time to offer love, counsel and support. They know I’d do the same for them.

I’ve come to learn that good friends are more valuable than money, fame or career success. Yet many Christians I know struggle in the area of relationships. Many people I’ve met—even pastors—admit they have no friends. And many churches are full of lonely people who are starving for friends but don’t know how to make any.

The modern church does not always place a high value on relationships. While the New Testament commands us to “fervently love one another from the heart” (1 Pet. 1:22, NASB), we have developed a cold corporate culture. We are content to herd people into buildings for services and then herd them out. Our main concern is that they occupied a seat and listened to a sermon. But did they connect with each other? Even in churches that try to nurture relationships, only a fraction of the people get involved in small groups.

Personally, I don’t believe we will see New Testament revival power or New Testament impact until we reclaim fervent New Testament love. But that realm of love isn’t possible without deep healing and serious attitude adjustments. Here are five of the most serious reasons Christians today struggle in the area of relationships:

1. Self-centeredness. Jesus defined love when He said, “Greater love has no one than this, that one lay down his life for his friends” (John 15:13). Real friendship is always sacrificial. We tend to want friendship on our terms; we want to be loved and encouraged and comforted. But if we want that kind of love, we should be willing to give it to someone else first. British preacher Charles Spurgeon wrote, “Any man can selfishly desire to have a Jonathan; but he is on the right track who desires to find out a David to whom he can be a Jonathan.”

By J. Lee Grady

J. Lee Grady is an author, award-winning journalist and ordained minister. He served as a news writer and magazine editor for many years before launching into full-time ministry. Lee is the author of six books, including 10 Lies the Church Tells Women, 10 Lies Men Believe and Fearless Daughters of the Bible. His years at Charisma magazine also gave him a unique perspective of the Spirit-filled church and led him to write The Holy Spirit Is Not for Sale and Set My Heart on Fire, which is a Bible study on the work of the Holy Spirit.

Related Post

Leave a Reply

Related Podcasts

More News
When Was Hell Prepared?
When Was Hell Prepared?
What Is Spiritual Warfare?
What Is Spiritual Warfare?
The Greatest Spiritual War for the Future Is the Past, Present and Future
The Greatest Spiritual War for the Future Is the Past, Present and Future
Tucker Carlson Shares His Testimony: ‘I Was Mauled by a Demon’
Tucker Carlson Shares His Testimony: ‘I Was Mauled by a Demon’
Mike Signorelli Talks Demonic Possession, Oppression and Generational Curses
Mike Signorelli Talks Demonic Possession, Oppression and Generational Curses
A Night of Unity at Christ Church: Arabs and Jews Worship Jesus Together in Jerusalem
A Night of Unity at Christ Church: Arabs and Jews Worship Jesus Together in Jerusalem
Amanda Grace, Faith Leaders Host Prayer Night for the Trump Family
Amanda Grace, Faith Leaders Host Prayer Night for the Trump Family
Is Fear Stopping You from Fulfilling God’s Purpose in Your Life?
Is Fear Stopping You from Fulfilling God’s Purpose in Your Life?
Isaiah Saldivar’s Remarkable Message: ‘I Hear Chains Breaking’
Isaiah Saldivar’s Remarkable Message: ‘I Hear Chains Breaking’
Greg Locke: How Biblical Generosity Transforms Lives
Greg Locke: How Biblical Generosity Transforms Lives
previous arrow
next arrow
Shadow

Latest Videos

Copy link