Her name is Abigail. She was a beautiful woman whose wisdom saved her fool of a husband, Nabal, from certain death after he insulted David, who was later crowned king of Israel.
Abigail had godly wisdom. When she heard that David was going to kill Nabal, she didn’t go yelling and screaming at her husband. She must have known that it never pays to argue with a fool, because she did the opposite. Sometimes wisdom requires that we measure our words carefully and use them to calm a situation and not make matters worse.
I am blessed to be married to a man who does exhibit wisdom, but before I met him, I had been in relationships with people who made me feel vulnerable and insecure because they were constantly putting me in dangerous situations. I never knew what threat I might face from one moment to the next.
One boyfriend was hotheaded and bad-tempered, and there were times when his anger was directed at me. Once, I came close to being a victim of road rage when he began to pursue another driver who had been rude. After the other driver was out of sight, he turned his anger toward me because I tried to defuse the situation. He drove recklessly all the way back to his apartment. My heart was pounding hard in my chest because I was so afraid of what could have happened.
Today, I am grateful that even then God gave me wisdom to be able to calm arguments. In the case of the angry boyfriend, I prayed that level minds would prevail. God answered, and the guy and I were both able to walk away from what could have been a bad situation.
As a leader in ministry, I need wisdom. I can’t live or lead without it. Don’t think for minute that I haven’t wanted to lash out at people who say mean things about me or the church behind my back. A wise, godly woman will pray before she responds.
It is impossible to live a lifestyle of godly wisdom without help from the Holy Spirit. The Spirit will tell us when and how to respond in every area of our lives. For instance, my husband recently broke the garage door. I didn’t say a word about it, even though I knew what had happened. He said, “I remember a day when you would have fussed about that door, but this time you were really cool about it.” I had come to a place in life where I began to ask myself whether it was worth it to get myself all worked up. Would it have been worth it to argue about something that wasn’t going to change? The answer is no.
In a different situation God gave me the wisdom to know how to support my husband. As I began to recognize each of our strengths and weaknesses as leaders, I saw that I naturally enjoyed some of the tasks he enjoyed the least. So I began to handle those tasks. Our complementary differences are what make us a great team. Wisdom has shown me that we don’t need to compete; we each have unique contributions to make as leaders. Some couples who lead together, whether in ministry or business, find themselves butting heads or unable to agree on what approach or strategy is best. But this isn’t what God desires. Wisdom can make all the difference! {eoa}
This article is an excerpt from Unthinkable: Do the Unordinary to Experience the Extraordinary (Charisma House, 2018) written by Mia K. Wright. Wright is co-pastor and director of ministry at The Fountain of Praise in Houston, Texas. Host of the popular Metamorphosis women’s conference, Wright is a noted community influencer. She has been a host on TBN’s Praise the Lord and a guest on Daystar’s Joni Table Talk and Celebration programs. Wright holds a Bachelor of Arts from the University of Texas at Austin and a Master of Divinity from Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary.
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